An Atheist's Easter

Among the religious paths one may travel, that of the atheist can be unique. Our biggest pitfall lies in defining ourselves by our nonbelief, rather than our beliefs. When combined with anger, with shame and guilt, and with the ever freshly-laid macadam of betrayal, we may find ourselves wandering in our own wilderness. Once the first surge of courage subsides, comfort lies in the sure knowledge that one has rejected that to which so many others adhere.

Easter can present particular challenge for the atheist. Even the marginally religious find their way to church leaving the atheist to taste once again the bile of discarded myth and the oppression of social paradigm. We might get edgy and may be a little shorter of patience at this time of year. We love the crocus, the daffodil, and even the dandelion, but we resist the unbridled joy of springtime metaphors in favor of a balanced appreciation of all seasons.

The lesson for me came when I realized that atheism is not an end, but a freeing and glorious beginning. Released from the constructs of sacred and supernatural, the atheist plunges into the wonder and mystery of the cosmos as an equal partner with all existence. Freed of the tyranny of science and sentience, the atheist examines the unknowable fields and forces surrounding us

The atheist can know epiphany without a risen Christ and can appreciate the man Jesus and his message. The atheist can know the triumphal redemption of Passover beyond the temple rules and the bound of any one folklore. Easter and Passover represent the celebration of renewal, a feeling we all can marvel in and share.

This Easter, I will sit in my congregation’s worship service. I might actually listen to the words being spoken. But, mostly, I will be present with others, stretching out beyond this identifying shell to commune with the minds and souls around me. I will feast on the quick energy of chocolate, the sustaining strength of my fellow humans, and the raw power of the universe.

Gun Deaths in Pittsburgh

I may be living in New York City now, but I am a long-time Pittsburgher. Today, I can only think of the heartache being felt in my City after the senseless deaths of three police officers at the hands of yet another disturbed gun owner.

When will this ever end?

I've heard all of the arguments before. Tell them to five girls who have lost their fathers, and two wives and a fiance now left widowed. Please, tell them to their faces why these men needed to die to protect your right to own firearms.

How about a silly example. Let's say that I loved bowling more than anything in my life. I bowled every day and owned 16 different balls for different lane conditions. But, every year, thousands of people were being murdered and injured by people with bowling balls. Yes, I can argue that I have a constitutional right to pursue happiness. Yes, owning a warehouse of bowling balls is legal. And yet, I would not for one second think twice about giving my passion up completely if there was any hope that getting rid of bowling balls (or at least making it marginally difficult to obtain them) would save innocent lives. I place the value of human life above a legalistic fanaticism to maintaining my rights and to the pursuit of a unique form of pleasure.

Pick your study. Gun-related deaths per capita in the United States dwarf those of other developed nations. In some instances, our rate of gun violence is 10 or even 20 times that of other developed nations. Quibble away with the statistics, but this is simply unacceptable.

A long-time friend said that the shooter was opposed to 'Zionist propaganda' and was fearful that his right to own weapons would be taken away. "He always said that if someone tried to take his weapons away he would do what his forefathers told him to do and defend himself." Is this the right the gun lobbyists in this country really want to defend? I say that the right of the police, as well as hundreds of millions of innocent citizens, to live their lives free of fear and violence trumps paranoid delusions and reactionary propaganda about what the founders of this country really intended.

This madness will not end until enough citizens petition their legislators to enact sane gun control laws. We cannot hope to address this issue until the voices calling for reason and responsibility outnumber the dollars of the gun lobbyists.

Ya Gotta Love Facebook

Any doubts I might have had about Facebook are gone. Today I received an email and friend request from a person I had lost track of and who utterly changed my life more than 20 years ago.

In 1985, I was taking doctoral classes in Business, mainly as a credential for advancement in the university administration. Things went well for a couple of terms. But, during the summer of 1986, I was fed up with the way doctoral students were treated. A fellow student named Joyce sensed my frustration and talked me into going out for a drink.

As I ranted about everything from classes to the state of the world, she told me that I sounded like a brochure she had just picked up at a church the past Sunday. The brochure was an introduction to Unitarian Universalism, of which I knew nothing at the time.

Within weeks, I belonged to a fellowship. I only lasted one more term in the doctoral program and lost track of Joyce until today. And here I am, getting close to the end of my preparation to become a Unitarian Universalist minister.

Would I have found this religious tradition anyway? Who knows? I had not found it after 30 years of life and 20 years of searching for a religion that made sense. But for that chance conversation, and for Joyce's compassion and caring, I might never have started down the path toward my call to ministry.

Is it any wonder that I believe in synchronicity? We just never know what impact even the smallest effort of reaching out to another person can have on their lives. Joyce, thank you so much for reaching out to me and starting these wheels in motion.

The Value of Good Times

One of the reasons I began blogging was to express opinions about "big picture" issues and to discuss matters of ultimate importance. Usually, my posts border on the serious (perhaps ranting), because something has riled me up or otherwise made my hair stand on end.

Not today, folks. Today, the house special pizza with everything on it is free to all. Pull up a chair for yourself and your own muse and enjoy a slice on the house.

Oh, don't get me wrong...the world is still a mess. The economy is in the crapper, basic human rights remain in jeopardy across the globe, and our vision of beloved community seems a distant dream. Tomorrow, I may well go nuclear and blast some new injustice.

But, today, I am happy. And, there is nothing wrong with that. In fact, I highly recommend it to everyone.

Why am I so happy that I risk my daily pizzatorium profits sharing my joy with you? There are many reasons, but the biggest of them is that after years of worthwhile work raising a family and helping others, I am pursuing my dream. I am preparing for a life in ministry - a life of hard work and commitment, a life that is enormously rewarding, and a life that my experiences have forged for me. I am living in a tiny apartment watching my life savings dwindle away, and I couldn't care less because I am doing what I love to do.

I've got my computer, Coltrane on the stereo, fresh-brewed coffee, and you, gentle reader. I'm working at a church that is amazing, but still can use my talents. I am meeting interesting people, exploring the greatest city on Earth, and entering a living historical tradition of courageous men and women who changed the world. And, for the first time in a long time, I've got the ability to appreciate it all and know just how lucky I am to have the chance to do the same.

That, of course, is the issue. Every day, people tell us how to live our lives. Companies spend millions to tell us what to buy, what new disease lurks in our future, and how to eat, smell, and look. Bosses tell us how to act and think. Society tells us what is right and wrong. And all of them pretend to tell you how to be happy.

Do you know how to be happy? This is how. Sit down and figure out for yourself what you want to do with your life. Then go do it. It really is that simple. Write down your goal on a piece of paper and post it on your refrigerator. Then make everything in your life serve that goal.

Is it easy? Of course not. Nothing worth having ever is. But, no one in the world can do it for you. And here is the secret. If you are putting off your goal because you are trying to help someone else achieve their goal, it doesn't work. Because, in the end, you can't fully help others until you have helped yourself. Until you have pursued your own goal, you are not in the right frame of mind to help another achieve theirs.

Is entry into the ministry a sacrifice? You bet - just ask any seminarian. The discernment process of becoming a minister is painful and frightening, and successful completion of the process causes wounds and loss. But, only by surviving this process, by thriving in this process and achieving this goal, can we as ministers help others to do the same.

So enjoy your pizza. Because when you leave the pizzatorium, I want you to think about your goal in life, whether you are on a path to achieve it, and if not, why not.

Grand Reopening of the Pizzatorium in New York!

My muse sleeps soundly in a corner of the kennel, resting after another challenging January of classes at Meadville Lombard Theological School. In the meantime, my life flies like pizza dough, stretching, awaiting an unknown assortment of toppings. After 42 years in Pittsburgh, I moved to New York City this week. I am now living in a first floor apartment in Forest Hills, just a few blocks from the 71st Street subway station and access to all this metropolis has to offer. After taking my son to Penn Station for the return train ride home, I walked up to Times Square. I stood in the center traffic island, along with the throng of tourists, gawking at the sight.

Throughout the week, I walked and explored the neighborhood. I am a five minute walk from groceries and hardware; laundry and pharmacy; bank, bagels, and Barnes and Noble; and any number of restaurants. Today, I found half a mile south on Metropolitan Avenue: a comics/collectibles store (run by a Pittsburgh Steelers fan!), a German restaurant, and an Irish pub.

And my apartment is small enough to force me to venture out often. I have all of the necessities of life -- books, music, my World War I posters on the walls, computer, and a bed. Sadly, I actually must begin working in another week. In the meantime, I was invited to the Metro NY LREDA winter retreat, which will provide a chance to catch up with some old friends and meet new colleagues. The retreat takes place in Murray Grove, the historic Universalist landmark of Thomas Potter and John Murray. What an awesome way to begin my internship - by touching base with this significant heritage of our movement.

So, my dough lies waiting. I can only imagine what inspiring condiments life has in store.

A Network of Gratitude

This past Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, his Network of Mutuality words inspired me. The events of the past few weeks move me to write about my own life's network.

Entering the ministry elicits a broad range of emotions, from the exhilarating and passionate to the fearful and daunting. A life of ministry presents many paradoxes ... crowded solitude ... powerless authority ... an overwhelming sense of knowing and being inadequately.

Throughout the journey, incredible people dedicate themselves to our call. Their love and support remind us of the importance of our quest, the viceral need for our ministries.

• To the members and staff of the First Unitarian Church of Pittsburgh -- you will always be my home church; the gardeners who provided the fertile soil to plant the seeds of my call.
• To the children and youth I served -- you fed my call and watched it grow toward maturity.
• To religious educators everywhere -- you welcomed my contributions, validated my gifts, and continue providing support for my expanded call.
• To my fellow seminarians -- you walk the road with me in love, and I eagerly anticipate years of mutual support and enduring care.
• To my colleagues in New York -- I eagerly anticipate our year together, having already experienced your inviting arms of welcome.

Specifically during the recent weeks, let me also thank the following people:

• Betty, a warm and tireless pillar of First Church, thank you for your encouragement and for coordinating a farewell that touched me and epitomized the work of teaching congregations.
• Laura, after walking many miles together, you freed me to follow my call -- I wish you life's greatest happiness.
• Jen, my co-pilot for many years at First Church, I can only hope to work with someone as talented and caring in my future churches.
• Linda, your engaging warmth and professionalism made finding exactly the apartment I wanted in New York not only successful, but enjoyable.
• Jennifer, an amazing and vibrant woman, your hospitality will endure in my heart and mind long after two weary nights for my body.

To all those who have gone before us...

To my parents who gave me my tools of humanity...

To my children who continue to teach me...

To those who share my passions and struggle for a better world...

To everyone I will meet and spend time with on this road of life...

Thank you.

Second Draft UUA Purposes and Principles

According to uuworld.org, an agenda item for the January meeting of the Board of Trustees of the Unitarian Universalist Association was the second draft of the new UUA Purposes and Principles prepared by the Commission on Appraisal. I am sure that many months of intensive discussion lie ahead of us on this matter.

I have concerns about a number of the proposed changes. I certainly agree with many comments I have read on some discussion lists that the new draft Sources section seems to represent a step backward as an expression of our religious heritage.

But, I will restrict my comments to one word in the current document - the word that most distresses me and addresses all of my other concerns with the current discussion. That word is found in the revised seventh principle, which the current draft has altered from:

"Respect for the interdependent web of all existence of which we are a part" to
"Reverence for the interdependent web of all existence of which we are a part."

I can well imagine that many people will see little difference in this modest appearing change. But, for the many thousands of Unitarian Universalists whose religious philosophy has moved beyond the construct of god, the new word carries ominous baggage.

The Merriam-Webster dictionary definition of the word "reverence" contains the following as the first meaning: "honor or respect felt or shown : deference; especially: profound adoring awed respect." Following the link to the meaning of the word "deference" provides this amplification: "respect and esteem due a superior or an elder ; also: affected or ingratiating regard for another's wishes."

Anyone whose personal religious philosophy includes atheism, agnosticism, skepticism, humanism, and nontheism, among others, should be concerned about the alteration of this word. What is it exactly that we are considering "superior?" To what or whose wishes exactly are we ingratiating ourselves?

More details are available if one examines the synonyms of the word "revere."

revere, reverence, venerate, worship, adore mean to honor and admire profoundly and respectfully. revere stresses deference and tenderness of feeling. reverence presupposes an intrinsic merit and inviolability in the one honored and a similar depth of feeling in the one honoring. venerate implies a holding as holy or sacrosanct because of character, association, or age. worship implies homage usually expressed in words or ceremony. adore implies love and stresses the notion of an individual and personal attachment [my italics].

Parts of this summary give me little cause for concern. However, taken as a whole, I feel a distinct tone of theism infused in the meaning of this word. As one who has spent many years of his life moving beyond believing in an omniscient, perfect, holy, or even just superior force for "good" in the universe beyond what we as equal beings in all existence are capable of creating and preserving ourselves, I cannot support this proposed word change.

I must admit to finding it ironic that during the "language of reverence" debates of recent years, it never occurred to me to question the word "reverence" itself, until this proposed draft was released. Perhaps those responsible for this draft felt that the word "respect" did not reflect strongly enough our regard for the interdependent web of all existence. If that is the case, then I would propose modifying the existing principle to express our "deep respect," and might even go so far as to consider "ultimate respect," although I imagine others might challenge that modifier. But, "reverence" is not a word I am willing to support in this context.